Through it all

All day it looked like it would start to rain any moment, but it didn't,
He has been out all day, hoping for it to rain, for he was burning inside.
It didn't rain.He stopped at the pedestrian walk way as he spotted a coffee shop.
His steps moved towards the coffee shop, as his hand went to his pocket to get
out some change.
That's when his fingers touched a folded paper kept in his pocket and he started to
burn inside all over again. he stopped, stared and then moved away.
The roads were filled with people, Friday night revelers they all.And he walked.
He walked past the play school,He walked past the theater. He walked past the
church, the lake and the hospital.. . he walked till he was in the heart of the city.
He heard people talking about how rainy it seems, he saw young couples holding
hands walking.He saw the flower shop,and the baker, and the jeweler's display
window. He once wanted to come to all these places. He sat on a bench near the
fountain, the one that had a mural of a couple riding on a Chariot.He sat there and
did just that, as people walked by, surprised to see this young man siting out in the
freezing cold without a coat.
He wiped the drop or sweat forming on his forehead, jumped on his feat and with
definitive steps walked to the nearest phone both.He had come to the busiest place
in the city , so that the noises around him would drown the emotions in his voice.
He took out the folded piece of paper and dialed the number written on it.With great
effort he spoke. And with even greater difficulty he heard her her speak...
with soft hands he kept the phone down and walked straight to his home.
Once inside he went straight to bed, and as he buried his face in the pillow,
it started to rain...

High on pain

The sweetest kiss leaves a bleeding chest.........

weak against the weakness !!! part -2

" i cant talk about it, you wont understand"
she said for the millionth time..
and I died an infinite number of deaths inside me that very moment.

weak against the weakness !!!

Each one of us wants to see our partner as perfect, without any weakness or vice,
in perfect sync with our own personalities, and aligned to our thoughts.
Such is the effect of love that it not only helps you overlook any flaws in the person
one loves,but also makes the person not perceive the faults or weaknesses in his
beloved at all. Love smooths out all the jagged edges in the loved one's personality,
well at least for a while.

Love is all accommodating and that's why it is said that to love truly is to love
every thing about your beloved. Physical attributes, mental strength, traits of
personality, tastes, preferences, habits,mannerism, all ceases to exist in parts,
and there emerges a unified image of the person being loved. That is why it is in
all fairness , fine to love her hair, or her smile, or the joy of her eyes or the crackle
in her voice, Its not fair to claim to be in love with her only for all or any of these
reasons. Love her for who she is, and not for what she is . And similarly,
love him for who he is , and not what he is.

All of us want our lovers to understand whatever we say, as well as whatever
we don't say.But love requires you to not expect him to understand, but to
ensure that he does. NO matter how inflammable a torch, there can be no light
without that first spark. NO matter how understanding the guy , he can never
understand every single thing unless there is an effort to make him understand.

Love can at times be blinding too, and that's when it becomes self destructing.
With time things, that we did do, or did not do, when the relationship was new
and fragile, tend to creep in to our behavior, so strongly that they become a
norm in our behaviors towards our loved.While he might now be a part of
your life close enough to be able to hear what you never earlier said, to
understand fears and feelings that you never earlier shared and to ask things
he never earlier did, so closed and rigid are you in you self laid guidelines
for your behaviors towards him,that you neither can comply to him nor lay to
rest his natural inquisitiveness, yet never lose the feeling of all being well
with him.

Almost always, the reason for rift is when one partner fails to see the other's
reason for discomfort.W the reasons could be as simple as some thing you
often say , to as complex as your reluctance to work your way out of your
self acknowledged weakness. I for instance cant see my partner resigned
to the fact that she would need support to do things, or that she is help less
in a particular situation, or that there is no other choice. To have a heart
big enough to love, means to have courage to face "come what may", with
your partner, or all by your self. Here is where the love cuts both ways.
So while he is trying to shock or push or shove or help you out of a self imposed
barrier, and getting frustrated at your reluctance,you are reluctant to
acknowledge the problem and think he is just being ignorant and finicky.


Love brings with itself the comfort and confidence of being your natural self
with your partner, as well as letting him be.But we more often then not take
this too far and start turning a blind eye even where one needs to change.
While its nice to hear that in love every thing about your partner seems perfect,
It would be a cardinal sin, to just go with this though and not try any help your
partner get better. I believe in a idle scenario , a motivation to get better for your
loved one, must come from with in , but there is no harm if one needs to be
driven by her partner. I for instance firmly believe in the cliche that my partner
makes me wanna be a better man.

Love is not all about charm of the person and a ever lasting longing, its also about
dealing with disagreements and repulsions. While to shut off and let the opponent
shout him self hoarse would be a good strategy any where else, this can never
ever work in a relationship. firstly for the fact that there is no opponent here.
Only a part of you thats differing from you.If you can not put across your point
to some one who essentially is an extension of your own self, you are essentially
unable to talk to your own inner self.

While its very easy keeping happy in love, its very difficult keeping the love in you happy
and healthy.

The Rain that never came!!!

Parched, burned, by the sun and the heat within, we were, in our own respective lives.

There seems to be water every where, but we don't have the heart to drink. we are both
feeling the conspicuous absence of each other in our life's, and thus the affinity to thirst.
As I said, there is water all around us, but we cant get our selves to drink. Somewhere a
drop of tear rolls down to moisten the parched lips, at other place a drop of sweat.The mere
act of breathing causes a caustic sensation inside the body of one, and gives a choking feeling
to the other.
While the thirst has moved on from the lips to the mind and spread to the body, the desire refuses
to wear off..One tries to freeze her longings with a cold shower, the other tries to scald his away
with a stream of steaming hot water.The souls have shrunk, and are now only tiny seeds in the bodies,
all shriveled up and unreceptive to the emotions of the outside world. The two intertwined lives are
waiting for the rain. that would come and soak them with life.
The rain that made him fall in love with her, would now have to help her redeem her love for him.
Separated, not by space and distance, but by the thoughts, aloof to the others emotions yet longing
for the same, they wait. They wait, for their love to flow into each other again, for there bodies to
be fluid, and there lips to be moist again.
And wait is all they will ever did , for the rain that never came.

What a day !!

Whew, now that's what i call an interesting day.So two guys on a bike tried
to run over me today morning as i stepped out of my home towards my cab boarding point.
Well yeah i know its kinda impossible to run any one over by a two wheeler.. lol.
but that just about best describes the intentions they had.
I would have ignored it as a case of reckless driving by drunk guys( though tough to believe, drunk at 7 a.m !!!)
had there not been a few more incidents a few days ago ..
I must be crazy to put this incident up here, but i guess we all are..
TO think that the dude or duddett or whatever it is , behind all this would come across n read this, is actually pushing my luck too far. But i care a Damn... I have no reason to be scared, cos i have no clue who it could be, or what could have caused such n angst.. I was a sitting duck but got away scratch free.. so clearly the motive was to cause a stirrer n a scare.. yeah I lost my breath for a while, but i ain't perturbed any more..
Try getting a couple of more wheels next time MF- S/D OB