Tragedies

I have realized that I am a sucker for Tragedies, the good old fashioned ones. The piercing little low moments in life are what I feed on. I am a Tragedy junkie.

Tragedy is such a sugar coated bitter pill which might as well be a bitter coated sugar pill. Tragedy is not only in separation or failure or losing out in a close race. It’s also in staying together with a fear of separation, coming on top with a fear of being bettered and keeping the lead but worrying about being overtaken.
The abysmal ebb might not be a place that I would be able to rise from often, but I rise from the troughs occurring in plenty day in and day out. While I do not in any way self inflict myself with misery of any sort, I do get uncomfortable when all stays well for too long in my la-la land. And that's when I need something or someone to jolt things up a bit. More then a bit actually. A bitter relationship, a failed project, taxing time at work, a terribly lonely phase, bad health or just a promising stranger not living up to it. Any such nice little tragedies. The exponentially high number of times that the life pleasantly surprises me, makes me thing that I only really start to expect, just to be short changed. And I pull it of with comfort as if it’s a well rehearsed act. Being surprised and pleased, even when I know nothing ordinarily good ever gets thrown at me along the flow of life. And being shaken, even when I can already smell the extreme pleasure I will derive from getting out of this one back to normal. Recovering has become my favorite pass time since long and I never seem to get enough of it.