preserve myself

It was the third time that he fidgeted with his tie, looking himself 

up in the mirror, followed by wiping his sweaty hands over his 

handkerchief. It was uncharacteristic of him. He, off all people has 

always been least bothered about the way he looked. He checked 

his watch , it was already 3:00 p.m. He checked his spectacles, 

and then the tie and the handkerchief. He tried to put his hair in 

place by patting them.

Clearly he wasn't all at ease. Last time he had taken this suite out 

was when he attended a wedding, but that was long long back. 

He remembered the occasion for which he had brought this suite.

His eyes flinched. The fold lines were still faintly visible on his blazer.

He moved out to leave, he wasn't too far away from the place

but he decided to take a cab any ways.He ignored his friends 

suggestion of taking along some flowers.He hated the pompousness. 

The ride was about 5 minutes. He stepped out right in the view of 

the place where they were to meet. The tie, the handkerchief, the 

patting of the hair. He saw her standing there, her back turned 

towards him , but he knew it was her. He walked towards her, 

glad that she was looking the other way. but just as he reached 

close to her, she turned around and spotted him. Was he close

enough to her to speak, or should he move closer, another two

steps as they still looked eye to eye. His voice was failing him

and he knew no matter how much he had prepared himself,

his eyes were giving him away. He swallowed, and tried speaking,

but failed once again. he felt his hand reaching for his tie. Just then

she stepped forward and embraced him in a warm affectionate hug.

He choked on his emotions for a moment, and the very next moment

he felt relived. 

People looked at them , as they stood there hugging

each other.People looked at the young beautiful girl, dressed in 

vibrant and finest of designer dresses, and the man, grey haired, pale

and frail. He had a faint smile on his face as she rested her head on 

his shoulder.  "I am sorry Dad" she said, And he was now crying.

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I ate my biscuits all by myself, and I had four of them,
She offered me her cookie while she had just one.
And I felt so very guilty that very moment.

power of resolve

resolve is the only virtue

Besides

They sat next to each other, brothers, friends soul mates. The
sat hearing each second tick on the wall clock. Disappointment
had no place, in there hearts,but nor did resolve. Both of them ,
though quite, were thinking of the day they started something
to live there dream. They had both kicked cushy jobs,and a
potentially great future ahead to take this plunge. The memories
of that day were vivid in their minds. It was a new day in every
sense. The looked ahead with hope and a promise.
They were so sure of the step they were taking. They choose
a life of doing what they both loved, over a life of plentiful.
They chose a life of striving their way, rather then sailing the way
of the world. They jumped at the idea of doing things wrong on
there own , rather then doing things right the time trodden way.
Any not many were impressed by there decision, not many
precedences were present of what they were setting out to do .

Yet they never felt like underdogs. There attempts were not
inhibited by norms, nor were they expected to live up to the standards.
There was no standard that they were to be measured against. They
could set there own bench marks. There weren't any things that they
had to do, or certain ways they had to follow. While the flight plan was
uncharted, they were free, so be good or bad, to be successful or failure,
there own god damn way.

But as they went closer and closer to the sole aim that they started
to achieve, The harder it became for them to carry on. With rising
success, came adulation and expectations, Idolization and aspiration.
They were looked upon as inspiration, and they now had to live up to it .
They were expected to deliver the standards they had them selves set.
They were expected to keep trudging the not so easy off beat path they
had taken. They were to do things that they did with innovation, over
and over and all over again.Stifled, they felt the burden of there own
advancement and rise, weigh them down.And soon the power was out of
there hands, and it rested with the people who judged them.

It felt no different then the jobs they kicked, and ironically It came with a
lot more since it was solely up to them to make it work. Stifled, they decided
to close the door, move on,or should i say move back.
As they steps out of their office for the last time, they sighed with disappointment
of not being able to make it work, that this was over.
They shook hands and went there ways at the next intersection,
and sighed with relief, that what started as an excitement, and turned to
an ordeal , was finally over.